


this is my hell

by FlyingFreeYT



Series: Call me calloused, call me cold [1]
Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types
Genre: Chat Logs, Cody is a little shit, Crack, Fix-It of Sorts, Fox and windows are not good matches, Gen, Humor, Kinda, No Beta We Die Like Clones, No Plot/Plotless, Nonbinary Character, OOC, Original Character-centric, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Plo is wolffe's dad, Trans Female Character, Trans Male Character, V smol, Wolffe is a little shit, chat fic, ignoring the pain that is clone wars, season 7 HURTED, talks of STD's, very minor angst
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-05-04
Updated: 2020-06-24
Packaged: 2021-03-03 00:41:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 3,315
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24006040
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FlyingFreeYT/pseuds/FlyingFreeYT
Summary: Wolffe gets bored.Wolffe creates a group chat.Huge mistake
Relationships: CC-2224 | Cody & CC-3636 | Wolffe, CC-2224 | Cody/Obi-Wan Kenobi, CC-3636 | Wolffe & OMC, CC-5052 | Bly/Aayla Secura, Original Clone Character(s) & Original Jedi Character(s), every friendship imaginable
Series: Call me calloused, call me cold [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1674871
Comments: 21
Kudos: 202
Collections: Starwarschats





	1. The one where Brook roasts everyone

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [Command Squad Chat](https://archiveofourown.org/works/21475132) by [writehandman](https://archiveofourown.org/users/writehandman/pseuds/writehandman). 



> Hello I just finished season 7 and I haven't stopped crying. I hate it here  
> I wasn't originally gonna post this, just work on it on my own when I was bored for a pick-me-up, but multiple people have told me to post this so if you were one of those people: you have forced my hand. Also we need fix-it fics and crack fics to ignore the pain
> 
> This was inspired by Command Squad Chat by writehandman! Absolutely love the whole series, def recommend 
> 
> This is centered around my OCs more than canon characters!  
> General Coda Falcin- they/he  
> CC-7110 "Commander Atari"- he/him  
> ARC-1772 "Captain Rylie"- xe/they  
> ARC-1803 "Captain Silver"- he/him  
> ARC-2027 "Captain Kent"- he/they  
> ARC-1017 "Lt. Brook"- she/her

**[CC-3636** **_has added_ ** **CC-2224, CC-1010, CC-6454, CC-5052, CT-7567, CC-7110, ARC-27-5555, ARC-1409, ARC-1772, ARC-1803, ARC-2027, ARC-1017** **_and_ ** **JEDI GENERAL CODA FALCIN** **_to the chat_ ** **]**

_ CC-3636: I don’t know how well this is gonna work but here we go _

_ CC-6454: why _

_ CC-1010: WHY IS GENERAL FALCIN HERE _

_ JEDI GENERAL CODA FALCIN: lol _

_ CC-2224: THAT'S MY BEST FRIEND _

_ JEDI GENERAL CODA FALCIN: wolffe is my best friend shut up cody _

_ CC-7110: :( _

_ CC-2224: :( _

_ JEDI GENERAL CODA FALCIN: and u Atari _

_ CT-7567: WOLFFE WHAT IS THIS _

_ CC-3636: chaos _

_ CT-7567: WHY ARE MY ARCS HERE _

_ CC-3636:  _ **_chaos_ **

_ ARC-27-5555: TIGHT _

_ ARC-1772: god i already hate it here _

_ ARC-1803: suck it up. Bitch. _

_ CC-5052: WHAT IS HAPPENING _

_ JEDI GENERAL CODA FALCIN: ALRIGHT let's see if we can change names I hate them _

_ CC-2224: bully fox tiem babey _

_ CC-1010: FUCK YOU CODY _

_ CC-2224: suck it up. Nerd _

**[JEDI GENERAL CODA FALCIN** **_changed their name to_ ** **Coda]**

_ Coda: I DID IT _

_ CC-1010: boring  _

_ Coda: bitch _

_ CC-6454: Fox is crying now _

_ ARC-1803: WSHWFGEGYFV _

**[ARC-1772** **_changed their name to_ ** **Rylie]**

_ CC-3636: no fox is right 118th ppl are boring _

**[ARC-1017** **_changed_ ** **CC-3636** **_name to_ ** **Waffle]**

_ CC-5052: I'M YELLING _

_ CC-1010: WHO WAS THAT _

_ CC-2224: DJFGWYHGVU _

_ CC-6454: WAFFLE????? _

_ Coda: WAFFLE _

_ ARC-2027: THAT'S MY SISTER _

_ CC-1010: its always the quiet ones _

_ Waffle: BROOK- _

_ Coda: She didn’t speak in the chat ONCE and she came for Wolffe’s life _

**[ARC-2027** **_changed_ ** **ARC-1017** **_name to_ ** **Queen]**

_ CC-2224: silent and deadly _

_ CC-5052: ATARI HOW MANY ARC TROOPERS DO YOU HAVE?? _

_ CC-7110: a lot. I made all of them officers too which was one of the worst decisions ive ever made _

**[Queen** **_changed_ ** **CC-5052** **_name to_ ** **Mr. Secura]**

_ Mr. Secura: OH COME ON _

_ Waffle: UIEWQHWUEIRFGW _

_ CC-6454: BROOK _

_ CC-2224: Bly is simping _

_ ARC-1803: ew a het _

_ Rylie: Silver u literally complain about me getting all the girls _

_ CC-7110: KIDS _

_ ARC-2027: CHILDREN _

_ ARC-1803: YOU GET EVERYONE _

_ Rylie: SORRY U HAVENT GOTTEN LAID YET _

_ ARC-2027: OH MY GOD IS SILVER A VIRGIN _

_ ARC-1803: I _

_ ARC-1803: WELL _

_ CT-7567: watching this all unfold is a nightmare _

_ Coda: I deal with this daily _

**[Queen** **_changed_ ** **ARC-1803** **_name to_ ** **Virgin]**

_ CC-2224: NO MERCY _

_ Virgin: BROOK I TRUSTED YOU _

_ Queen: sucks to suck _

_ Waffle: so she speaks _

_ Coda: F in the chat for Brook _

_ Mr. Secura: F _

_ Coda: F _

_ ARC-2027: F _

_ CC-6454: F _

_ CC-2224: F _

_ CC-1010: F _

_ Virgin: F _

_ Queen: he cant do shit _

_ Queen: I can tell Koon _

_ Waffle: you wouldnt DARE _

_ Queen: maybe I would. Maybe I wouldn’t. Do you want to risk that? _

_ ARC-27-5555: WHAT DID WE MISS _

_ CT-7567: while you two assholes were doing whatever the hell you were doing Brook from the 118th is just murdering us _

_ ARC-1409: WHO IS WAFFLE _

_ Coda: WOLFFE _

_ ARC-27-5555: I'M YELLING _

_ ARC-27-5555: oh my god is commander wolffe of the wolfpack battalion intimidated by an ARC trooper _

_ Waffle: shut your fucking mouth _

_ Coda: let Brook change your names she has dirt on all of you _

_ Waffle: that's horrible _

_ CC-6454: i'm not sure if i'm ready for that _

_ Coda:  _ **_@Queen_ ** _ do it _

**[Queen** **_changed_ ** **CC-6454** **_name to_ ** **Windu’s bitch]**

_ Windu’s bitch: HWTA _

_ CC-2224: PONDS WHAT _

_ Waffle: ponds is there something you would like to tell us _

**[Queen** **_changed_ ** **CC-2224** **_name to_ ** **Kenobi-sexual]**

_ Kenobi-sexual: ok that's fair _

_ CC-1010: WAIT WHAT _

_ Coda: FOX DO YOU NOT KNOW _

_ Rylie: i swear it's so obvious  _

_ Windu’s bitch: i dont even see Cody that often and I know _

**[Queen** **_changed_ ** **CC-1010** **_name to_ ** **dumbass]**

_ Dumbass: HEY _

_ Waffle: she’s right _

_ Kenobi-sexual: Brook is just coming for our lives huh _

**[Queen** **_changed_ ** **ARC-27-5555** **_name to_ ** **Chaotic dumbass]**

**[Queen** **_changed_ ** **ARC-1409** **_name to_ ** **calculator]**

**[Queen** **_changed_ ** **ARC-2027** **_name to_ ** **babysitter]**

**[Queen** **_changed_ ** **CT-7567** **_name to_ ** **Rex]**

**[Queen** **_changed_ ** **CC-7110** **_name to_ ** **Tar]**

_ Windu’s bitch: I LOVE HOW REX IS JUST  _ **_REX_ **

_ Tar: BROOK WHAT DOES THIS MEAN _

_ Queen: when i first read your name on flimsi i misread it as tar _

_ Virgin: IFHEFHEHJFBEJ _

_ Queen: Kent saw one (1) shiny and adopted him _

_ Babysitter: dont talk to me or my son ever again _

_ Coda: DHFBHEFB _

_ Queen: i'm gonna go bully some shinies lmaooo bye  _

_ Coda: AND THAT'S MY ARC TROOPER _

_ Virgin: HEY _

_ Coda: Brook is my favorite okay i love her. Legend _

_ - _

_ Virgin: let's play: how many times do i have to yell my commander’s name until he fucking responds! We’re going on 6 _

_ Coda: WE ARE IN THE MIDDLE OF A BATTLE _

_ Virgin: IF I HAVE TO T E X T MY COMMANDER ABOUT A NEW STRATEGY I FUCKING WILL _

_ Virgin:  _ **_@Tar_ ** _ OLD MAN _

_ Tar: EXCUSE YOU _

_ Rylie: commander ur fucking deaf _

_ Tar: I HAVE ONE EAR _

_Virgin: NOW THAT I HAVE YOUR ATTENTION CAN YOU_ ** _PLEASE_** _TURN AROUND AND LOOK AT ME I HAVE AN IDEA_

_ - _

_ dumbass: 9878_09.png  _

_ dumbass: i am a GUARD and the chancellor gives me stacks of paperwork and says “foRgE mY siGnAtUre cOMMaNder” i'm going to jump _

_ Rex: fox are you okay _

_ Windu’s bitch: are any of us okay tho??? _

_ Rex: fair point _

_ dumbass: NO i am not okay _

_ dumbass: I AM THE SAME AGE AS A GOOD AMOUNT OF YOU AND HALF OF MY HAIR IS GRAY _

_ dumbass: i fucking hate politicians i want a drink _

_ Rex: if i hear skywalker talk about Senator Amidala again i Will have a stroke _

_ Coda: does he think he’s being subtle?  _

_ Virgin: he’s failing at it _

_ Rex: i'm honestly insulted that he thinks I don’t know _

_ dumbass: i'm going to desert _

_ Kenobi-sexual: you wouldn’t _

_ Coda: PLEASE dont leave me _

_ Coda: i'm leaving the jedi once this war is over lmao fuck this but you are NOT leaving me now _

_ Mr. Secura: you plan on leaving? :0 _

_ Coda: the jedi hate me anyway lmao _

_ Coda: my existence makes windu want to throw me out a window _

_ Rylie: what could u have possibly done- _

_ Queen: besides break the jedi code- _

_ Tar: BROOK NO _

_ Virgin: we do NOT bring him up _

_ Coda: SHES RIGHT THO _

_ Coda: ALSO I’m mandalorian so the council hates me by default _

_ Windu’s bitch: all the clones just “0-0” _

_ Kenobi-sexual: are we technically mandalorian tho- _

_ Coda: let's not get into the logistics cause my head will hurt- _

_ Coda: but yeah the order originally rejected me when obiwan and quigon brought me to the temple until they realized i was super powerful in the force _

_ Coda: i'm p sure there was something else but they never mentioned it to me so *shrugs* _

_ Tar: didn’t they think you were the chosen one until Kenobi and Jinn brought Skywalker _

_ Coda: yup lol _

_  
_ _ Coda: 8 year old me didn’t care anyway. I was vibing _

_ Coda: my master also gave me alcohol when I was like. 12. _

_ Kenobi-sexual: what was with my general and his master with bringing young force sensitive kids to the temple _

_ Coda: honestly idk quigon was weird tbh _

_ Coda: I never trusted him _

_ Queen: you don’t trust anyone _

_ Coda: you got me there _

_ dumbass: BACKUP did you just say your master gave you alcohol at  _ **_12_ **

_ Coda: YUP _

_ dumbass: wait how old are you _

_ Waffle: FOX _

_ Coda: I'M 20 LMAO I was knighted early cause ya know. War n shit and I already had a batallion _

_ Tar: General Raeh was one of those generals that you can get high as a kite with _

_ Virgin: he provided the spice 9/10 times _

_ Rex: oh my god _

_ Windu’s bitch: Mace would have a stroke _

_ Queen: who _

_ Windu’s bitch: GENERAL WINDU _

_ Waffle: ponds I spent the last 11 years believing you were straight _

_ Kenobi-sexual: is anyone here straight tho??? _

_ Coda: bly, atari, maybe rex? _

_ Mr. Secura: I feel threatened _

_ Windu’s bitch: relax you won’t get hatecrimed _

_ Rex: OHMYGOD _

_ Coda: REX UR STRAIGHT TOO RIGHT _

_ Rex: I THINK _

_ dumbass: think??? Damn even I'm not that repressed _

_ Tar: Fox you denied being gay until last month shut up _

_ dumbass: >:0 _

_ Coda: so in conclusion: Fox is a twink and Bly is a simp _

_ dumbass: WH _

_ Tar: yeah _

_ Virgin: yup _

_ Waffle: yea _

_ Rylie: ^ _

_ Windu’s bitch: ^^ _


	2. the one where fox gets bullied by everyone

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm taking a lot of these from irl convos with my twitter mutuals! We are super chaotic
> 
> Some of these may or may not be based off of some convos in that chat. whoops.

**[** **_babysitter_ ** **changed their name to** **_I love my son]_ **

_ I love my son: GUYS I'M CRYING _

_ Rylie: oh god _

_ Virgin: W _

_ I love my son: KODAK MADE FRIENDS _

_ Coda: good for him? _

_ I love my son: HE AND A GROUP OF SHINIES ARE PAINTING MATCHING MARKINGS ON THEIR ARMOR HELP _

_ - _

_ Rylie: ok so _

_ Rylie: let's say that theoretically _

_ Rylie: I theoretically got an STD _

_ Coda: you WHAT _

_ I love my son: RYLIE _

_ Waffle: oh my god _

_ Virgin: ARE YOU SERIOUS _

_ Queen: you better be joking _

_ Kenobi-sexual: OMG HSAVAG _

_ Rylie: THEORETICALLY  _

_ dumbass: i'm going to have a stroke _

_ Queen:  _ **_Ronin_ ** _ is going to have a stroke _

_ Coda: RYLIE??? EXPLAIN _

_ Tar: are you fucking serious _

_ Tar: Brook you want to be captain? _

_ Mr. Secura: ouch _

_ Windu’s bitch: DAMN _

_ Rylie:  _ **_THEORETICALLY_ **

_ Rylie: BASICALLY I hooked up with someone when we were on leave and I’ve been having these symptoms but the Kaminoans wouldn’t make my immune system this weak _

_ Virgin: have you been tested yet _

_ Rylie: Ronin scares me _

_ Chaotic dumbass:  _ **_RONIN????_ **

_ Rex: I’ve met Ronin maybe twice _

_ Rex: he wouldn’t hurt a fly _

_ Rylie: NO U DONT UNDERSTAND _

_ Rylie: Ronin is quiet. But like. Brook quiet _

_ Queen: what the FUCK does that mean _

_ Rylie: SILENT AND DEADLY _

_ Rylie: if I went up to Ronin like “test me for an STD” he’d skin me alive _

_ Chaotic dumbass: can’t be worse than Kix _

_ calculator: no one is worse than kix _

_ Kenobi-sexual: you guys clearly have not met Helix _

_ Kenobi-sexual: he stabbed me once _

_ Rylie: my point still stands: Ronin will murder me _

_ Coda: Rylie pls get tested I don’t need a Captain with HIV _

_ Rylie: silver will u come with me so Ronin doesn’t skin me alive _

_ Virgin: I am NOT making promises _

_ - _

_ Rylie: I'M STD FREE GUYS AND GALS _

_ Rylie: I JUST PICKED UP SOME WEIRD ILLNESS BUT I'M BETTER NOW _

**_[Several people are typing]_ **

_ - _

_ Waffle: this is the best day of my life _

_ Waffle: I just saw Fox get thrown out a window _

_ Tar: you WHAT _

_ Kenobi-sexual: IT WAS GREAT HAHA _

_ Coda: omg do you have a video _

_ dumbass: oh my god _

_ Waffle: Of course I do _

_ dumbass:  _ **_oh my god_ **

_ calculator: pls send _

_ Waffle: fox_window.mp4 _

_ Rex: I'M LOSING MY MIND _

_ Queen: omg _

_ Chaotic dumbass: FOX?? _

_ Mr. Secura: oh yikes _

_ Coda: WHA T THE FUCJ _

_ Virgin: I'M YELLING _

_ Rylie: what even happened _

_ dumbass: my unit was sent out to get rid of a crime ring in the lower levels _

_ Waffle: I came along as backup and to annoy Fox _

_ Waffle: best moment of my life _

_ Windu’s bitch: Fox did you really fall 4 stories and get up like it’s nothing _

_ dumbass: and what if I did _

_ Coda: Wolffe’s wheezing in the background makes it 10x better _

_ dumbass: listen _

_ dumbass: it was a very traumatizing moment for me _

_ Chaotic dumbass: I'M CRYING _

_ dumbass: trooper I can have you demoted _

_ Chaotic dumbass: you wouldn’t DARE _

_ dumbass: dont test me _

_ Rex: Don’t talk to my ARC like that >:( _

_ dumbass: try me bitch _

_ Rex: Wolffe is Fox standing near a window right now?? _

_ Kenobi-sexual: OH MY GOD _

_ I love my son: oh rip _

_ Waffle: he is  _

_ Rex: push him for me _

_ Waffle: aight _

_ Waffle: fox_window2.mp4 _

**_[Several people are typing]_ **

_ - _

_ Chaotic dumbass: i bring news _

_ Chaotic dumbass: the captain screamed today _

_ calculator: Fives you could have worded it literally any other way _

_ Coda: rex What _

_ Rex: listen _

_ Rex: the General threw me with the force _

_ Rex:  _ **_again_ **

_ Rylie: again? _

_ Waffle: i hear it's a regular occurance _

_ Rex: I GOT THROWN??? WITH NO WARNING _

_ Tar: lol _

_ Kenobi-sexual: my general threw himself with no warning does that count _

_ Coda: oh my god _

_ Windu’s bitch: I feel like my General is the only one that at least pretends to be sane _

_ Coda: he has to deal with the council’s bullshit i’m surprised he hasn’t snapped yet _

_ Mr. Secura: my general and I got matching tattoos!! :D _

_ Tar: Bly- _

_ dumbass: buddy no one is surprised _

_ Mr. Secura: we got each other’s names  _

_ Virgin: that's fucking adorable _

_ Windu’s bitch: Atari what’s the most batshit thing Coda’s ever done _

_ Coda: wow ponds _

_ Tar: idk they don’t do anything too crazy _

_ dumbass: i call BULLSHIT when he was with the guard it was hell _

_ Coda: You’re just mad Thire and I pranked you constantly _

_ dumbass: you guys were so MEAN _

_ Coda: NOT MY FAULT YOU’RE AN EASY TARGET _

_ Waffle: where am i _

_ I love my son: sir you created this hellhole _

_ - _

_ Scream: who the fuck _

_ Scream: who the fuck changed my name _

_ Waffle: oh my god _

_ Coda: that looks so suggestive i hate it here _

_ calculator: i- _

_ Scream: it was cody wasn’t it _

_ Scream: or brook _

_ Queen: no _

_ Scream: _ **_it was cody wasn’t it_ **

_ Mr. Secura: OMG _

_ Kenobi-sexual: oop _

_ Scream: I'M COMING FOR YOUR KNEES _

_ Kenobi-sexual: let's do it baby i know the law _

_ dumbass: no you dont _

_ Kenobi-sexual: shut up fox _

_ Rylie: i- _

_ Virgin: Rex looks PISSED Cody run I see him running towards the 212th barracks _

_ Windu’s bitch: omg _

_ I love my son: rip in pieces cody _

_ dumbass: >:( _

_ dumbass: i hate it here _

_ Kenobi-sexual: Rex listen join me and we can beat up Fox together _

_ Scream: hm _

_ Rylie: shits getting real _

  
  


_ dumbass: i will block both of you _

_ Coda: do it pussy _

**_[CC-2224 has left the conversation]_ **

**_[CT-7567 has left the conversation]_ **

_ Coda: wait _

_ Queen: OH _

_ Mr. Secura: HLP _

_ Virgin: HAHAHAHA _

_ Waffle: oh my GOd _

_ Windu’s bitch: HEFVEGFVEGFVEGR _

_ calculator: FOX _

_ Chaotic dumbass: HELP ME _

_ dumbass: WH _

_ dumbass: THAT WAS AN ACCIDENT _

_ Windu’ sbitch: SURE _

_ Mr. Secura: I'M LSONG MY MIND _

_ Tar: oh m god _

_ I love my son: I'M CRYING _

_ Queen: holy shit _

_ dumbass: I DID NOT THINK IT WOULD DO THAT _

_ Virgin: I'M LAUGHING SO HARD _

_ Waffle:  _ **_FOX_ **

**[Mr. Secura** **_has added_ ** **CC-2224** **_to the chat]_ **

**[Mr. Secura** **_has added_ ** **CT-7567** **_to the chat]_ **

_ CC-2224: hey what the FUCK _

_ CT-7567: all my chat history is gone rip _

_ Coda: HELP _

_ Windu’s bitch: i'm losing my mind _

_ Windu’s bitch: FOX IS CRYING APPARENTLY _

_ dumbass: what _

_ Windu’s bitch: THORN JUST TOLD ME _

_ Windu’s bitch: screenshot_chatlog988.png _

_ dumbass: that bitch _

_ CT-7567: I can’t believe Commander Fox of the Coruscant Guard would block me _

_ CC-2224: this is a hate crime _

_ dumbass: oh my GOD _


	3. The one where Wolffe dies inside

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HI bit of a shorter segment but just wanted to get this out! School is out this upcoming week n then I have animation/MAP Parts to work on, so writing isn't gonna be my top priority. I'm hoping to get my current queue of MAP parts done and then work on a PMV and have writing higher on the priority list! 
> 
> Also appearances from Jesse bc I. I miss him a lot. Also timelines? who's she. This doesn't even take place anywhere in my OC's canon this fic is just a clusterfuck of my chaos at this point. Who cares, my fic my rules
> 
> ty to everyone who has commented! Thank you for dealing with my bullshit

**[Chaotic dumbass** **_has added_ ** **CT-5597** **_to the chat]_ **

_ Waffle: who _

_ Scream: oh my god why _

_ Coda: Whats happening _

_ Queen: all hell is about to break lose _

_ CT-5597: where am i _

_ Chaotic dumbass: HI JESSE _

_ CT-5597: I’m going to take a  _ **_wild_ ** _ guess and say that's Fives _

_ CT-5597: Fives what the fuck is this _

_ Coda: oh _

_ Coda:  _ **_oh no_ **

_ Mr. Secura: whomst _

_ CT-5597: Hi i'm Jesse from the 501st and I don’t know why i'm here _

_ Scream: this is my hell _

_ Tar: welcome to hell Jesse _

_ CT-5597: oh my god all the commanders are here _

_ Coda: Rank doesn’t matter here all we do is be bisexual and cry _

_ CT-5597: oh epic _

_ CT-5597: is Falcin the only jedi here _

_ Chaotic dumbass: yeah _

_ CT-5597: ah _

_ Scream: anyways I’m rex btw, Tar is Commander atari, Queen is Brook from the 118, Virgin is Capt Silver, dumbass is fox, I love my son is Capt Kent, Waffle is wolffe, Chaotic dumbass is fives, calculator is echo _

_ Scream: i dont think i need to explain the others _

_ Mr. Secura: wow _

_ Windu’s bitch: :( _

_ CT-5597: do i _

_ CT-5597: do I want to know the context to these names _

_ Queen: no _

_ CT-5597: aight _

**[CT-5597** **_changed their name to_ ** **Jesse]**

_ Tar: hm _

**[Tar** **_changed_ ** **Jesse** **_name to_ ** **half a braincell]**

_ Coda: I- _

_ Scream: lmao _

_ half a braincell: WHY _

_ Tar: I remember your dumbass u ain’t slick _

_ half a braincell: :( _

_ Chaotic dumbass: why is no one else up this is boring _

_ Scream: Fox is dealing with the senate rn _

_ Waffle: i think cody is in a battle at the moment _

_ Coda: oh oof _

_ Tar: rip _

_ - _

_ Scream: security_98843.mp4 _

_ Scream: hey cody _

_ Scream: cody _

_ Scream:  _ **_@glory_ **

_ glory: what _

_ Waffle: oh my god _

_ Windu’s bitch: cody why _

_ Tar: you did  _ **_not_ ** _ dogpile grievous _

_ dumbass: and I thought wolffe was the dumb one _

_ Waffle: shut the fuck up _

_ Coda: bold words coming from someone with ‘dumbass’ as a dn _

_ glory: listen _

_ glory: he was gonna get away _

_ Rylie:  _ **_you had a blaster_ **

_ glory: so _

_ Tar: so is this why your grieves are so dented _

_ Coda: do you just regularly kick droids in the face _

_ Scream: he punched a B1 during Christophsis _

_ glory: i am being attacked _

_ Tar: Cody stop being a dumbass challenge _

_ glory: I will fight you _

_ Tar: you dont understand how easy it would be _

_ Tar: I just need to mention Kenobi and then it's OVER for you _

_ glory: HEY _

_ - _

_ Tar: Falcin walked into a door frame today _

_ Coda: ppelase _

_ Coda: i'm half blind give me a break _

_ glory: I remember Wolffe did that for weeks after he lost his eye _

_ Waffle: hey _

_ Coda: This is discrimination _

_ dumbass: cry harder baby _

_ - _

_ glory: WOLFFE CALLED KOON DAD _

_ Waffle: CODY _

_ Coda: WHAT _

_ Mr. Secura: NO WAY _

_ Tar: HA _

_ Waffle: I DID NOT _

_ dumbass: cody did he really _

_ glory: DURING A BRIEFING TOO _

_ Scream: I WAS THERE _

_ Scream: CAN CONFIRM _

_ Windu’s bitch: DURING A BRIEFING? RIPPP _

_ Virgin: OMG _

_ Rylie: OH YIKES _

_ Waffle: I DONT THINK U GUYS UNDERSTAND THE PANCI I WENTR THRU _

_ Waffle: I WANT TOC RAWL INTO A HOLE AND DIE _

_ Coda: I'M SCREAMING _

_ half a braincell: Rip Commander Wolffe, 32BBY-21BBY _

_ Calculator: HELP _

_ Chaotic dumbass: OH MY GOD _

_ glory: IT WAS SO FUNNY _

_ glory: YOU COULD SEE KOON PROCESSING IT _

_ glory: AND SKYWALKER AND KENOBI WERE JUST STANDIBNGF THERE _

_ glory: WOLFFE _

_ glory: WOLFFE YOUR FACE _

_ Waffle: i'm crying _

_ glory: I'M IN TEARS _

_ glory: I'M SITTING IN MY QUARTERS LOSING MY SHIT GOODBYE _

_ Tar: Wolffe I knew u were a daddy’s boy but _

_ Waffle: PLEASE _

_ dumbass: Atari i am BEGGING please never say those words again _

_ Tar: cry furries cry _

_ dumbass: GOODBYE _

_ I love my son: I’m gonna cry rip commander wolffe _

_ Queen: did anyone else witness it _

_ Queen: besides the other two Jedi n Cody and Rex _

_ Waffle: SINKER AND BOOST WERE UB THE ROOM _

_ Virgin: OH NOOOO _

_ Rylie: HAHAHAHA _

_ Rylie: OUR SQUADS WORKED TOGETHER DURING THE FIRST FEW YEARS OF TRAINING N BEFORE SILVER N I WERE SELECTED FOR ARC TRAINING _

_ Rylie: WOLFFE SAY GOODBYE TO UR DIGNITY AND PUBLIC IMAGE _

_ Waffle: I have holed myself up in my quarters i am SHAKING _

_ Scream: I’ve just been crying this whole time the second the call stopped Skywalker and I lost our shit _

**[glory** **_changed_ ** **Waffle** **_name to_ ** **daddys boy]**

_ Coda: HELP M _

_ daddys boy: I- _

_ dumbass: OH YNM TGRJFHI _

_ Mr. Secura: I'M SCREAMIBNG _

_ Scream: HELP _

_ Windu’s bitch: OH MY GOD _


	4. The one where they beat Silver to death

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Remember how I said a lot of these are conversations I have with my online friends in our Twitter gc? Yeah. This entire chapter is various moments in that n I'll include screenshots DCGFVF  
> you're welcome, sorry this is short

_dumbass: Oh my fucking god_

_Mr. Secura: Oi_

_dumbass: someone made a palpatine dating sim i'm losing my fuckibg mind_

_Scream: I-_

_Rylie: what the fuck_

_I love my son: goodbye_

_Windu’s bitch: WHAT_

_Coda: GUYS_

_Coda: HELP ME I'M SO GAY I'M HAVING A CREISU_

_dumbass: you said that at the very wrong time_

_Coda: HLP_

_daddys boy: are we going to brush over a palpatine dating sim_

_Coda: HGHSGFCDSGFVDSH_

_daddys boy: i guess so_

_-_

_Rylie: petition to beat Silver to death_

_Virgin: Whore_

_Rylie: bitch_

_Coda: What_

_glory: god_

_Tar: idk why we’re beating him up but i'm down_

_Virgin: thanks commander_

_Rylie: this bitch switched out my grieves and now they’re different weights what the fuckv_

_Scream: does_

_Scream: does it matter_

_glory: YES????_

_Rylie: OFC IT DOES??? HELLO??_

_Coda: Rylie ur a sniper why does it matter_

_Rylie: THEY’RE DIFFERENT WEIGHTS??????_

_Queen: oh worm are we beating up Silver_

_Queen: Fuck yeah_

_Virgin: GOD_

_I love my son: 118th command squad paints matching markings on our armor_

_I love my son: that was really bad timing whoops_

_Tar: fuck yeah i'm down_

_Rylie: Yeah i’ll be sure to beat Silver up while wearing it_

_Coda: lmao_

_Virgin: So we all agree to just deck me_

_Tar: yeah_

_Rylie: yeah_

_Queen: Yeah_

_I love my son: yeah_

_Virgin: nice_

_-_

_Chaotic dumbass: I go like_ 🙆🙆🙆🙆 👊👊👊👊👊👊

_Scream: WHAT_

_Chaotic dumbass: and then I go_ 👄👄👄👄👄👄😳😳😳😤😤😤

_Scream: PLEASE HELP_

_Chaotic dumbass: finally I go_ 😅😅😅😅😅😆😆💪💓

_Scream: GOD_

_-_

dedicated to my friends ily guys

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [Group chats of chaos](https://archiveofourown.org/works/24665251) by [Bigbimess](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bigbimess/pseuds/Bigbimess)




End file.
